i realized that for the past few days,
i got a very bad depression
...
Thanks for hazel and kenneth be there to talk me through
after i let my feelings out,
i really feel much lighter
for the past few days
i had been very heavy in the heart
...
they actually taught me through this whole thing
they showed me that there are ways to solve this,
they helped me to find the solutions to solve my english,
if they haven't had come to give me the light to see,
i would have been regretting now
the deadlines for submitting the JAE
is pushing me to the edge
adding alot of pressure on me
not until hazel kenneth pull me back before i go deeper
...
from this lesson
i learnt many things
pardon me for being childish
i believed that i failed this english is fated
through this stage kenneth taught me to see the future infront of me
it is not that easy to make a decision which i won't regret
i really in the very difficult spot for choosing my choices

i failed this english in O level
made me feel the pain
i didnt feel pain failing when i was in school

i guess i had to turn now
i really had to use this very chance to improve my english
i will APPEAL to the course i want
i will retake english
because i know that i not only need english to get into poly
But to use in future
i had to make this opportunity
just like what jin xuan told me
"Turn Now"
i thought i had my turning point of my life
But now
i really see the turning point
i really see that there is something big waiting for me to do
i see that the big thing waiting for me
is something i know is not easy
it is more than turning into a better person
it is more than striving harder
IT is really up to me to see it
just like what jin xuan have said
it is for me explore it
i also had learnt that i really have good friends
they are really there when i really do need the help
going through this dark period really made me couldn't look brighter
it is so dark for me to think positive
when i thought all the hopes are really gone
my friends give me the lights to see
they gave me simple words
words that touched me..
they listened my heart
they willingly to listen to them

the very first thing i have to do
to read children level story books
i am not going to be ashame
because i am that poor
i had to start at the basic level
slowly
slowly
i had to move on
i type this post to remind me
myself
i
really turn
to be hardworking
i need reminders to keep myself going on
remembering what i need to do
i really want to see the day that i reach there
...

thanks everyone to give me support by putting tags
cheering me up
giving me encourage
..
i never knew that i am happy fruit
to land in into this state
i am really happy i came out to see the truths
i remind myself to be awake
i remind myself that this day i post this to remind myself that i really make to promise to give harder and harder in life
i remind myself to read this everyday
i remind myself that if i don't change
when i look at what i wrote and typed
and never did anything
i would be shameful
i remind myself that a person may produce millions of cells a day
but the next 2 weeks the person will change,
so if i got something i really want to do
i really go for it
i remind myself that the next 2weeks i wont forget what i want to do
i remind myself not to be lazy
i remind myself to happy
...